Reservations have been made! The boat has been claimed! It’s only a matter of waiting for A shift to be over now.
I’m spending Memorial Day at the lake! The boyfriend has really out done himself this time. I tell you what, he needs this for real. That man works like a dog. It’s time for a little R&R.
B)
:D Love from Georgia!!
Buckets and buckets of big alligator tears.
Because I have the sweetest boyfriend in the this big ole world.
He came in this morning just to kiss me good morning and tell me he loved me before he went to work. But that’s not what makes me want to just bawl like a baby.
I started worrying about this new job opportunity that I was really excited about because of a few minor things. 32-36 hours a week instead of 40, no medical insurance instead of full benefits. I just worry. I talked to a lady this morning who made sure I knew all of this, and afterwards I didn’t waste much time before I texted Justin. I wanted to get his advice, and hear where he was coming from. He told me that I should take it, and that I could probably afford to buy my own insurance. I told him then about the hours, and what I estimated my monthly paycheck to look like for the first three months. I told him that I was worried I wouldn’t be able to afford it. This is where he just made me break down.
“We can look around and price it. I think that will be plenty, but we’ll just see. If it’s not, we’ll find you a weekend job.”
It’s that “we” that he kept using. I know I sound loony, but you just have to know Justin to understand the weight and importance of that statement. I had been thinking earlier about how important it was for me to talk to Justin right away, because we share our lives together now. He needs to be the first to know things, because what affects me affects him. And then he sort of confirmed that by letting me know that I wasn’t going to be bearing this burden by myself. I HAVEN’T been bearing it by myself, because he’s been right there with me - calming me down when I panic, holding me close when I cry. That man has been checking the newspaper every week for jobs for probably three or four months - not for him, for ME. I didn’t know that until one day about a month and a half ago when he told me about a job opening he saw in the paper.
I’m telling you, this man is the best that I know. He is so kind, compassionate, and loving. He would kill me for saying all of that and “deflating” his ego, but it’s true. He cares so deeply. Not just for me, but for everyone that he considers himself close to. He is fiercely devoted and loyal. And he loves me. Me. Of all the women in the world, he chose me. Sometimes I can’t help but feel like I’m just not good enough for him. I can’t even express how amazing, significant, and loved he makes me feel.
He’s the best. I’m the luckiest girl in the world.
Tonight I went to my third fire meeting. Chief asked me if I was in or out in front of everyone, and I obviously said I was in. Afterwards, Rod assigned me the number 321. Now, what is so ridiculously cool about that is that Justin’s is 345. Together we make 5,4,3,2,1. BALLIN OUT. Thursday I get my gear, and I am officially able to fight fire! Justin says that Chief seems to really like me, and that just makes me want to pee my pants. Justin also taught me all sorts of cool stuff tonight. I can’t even contain myself, y’all. I just want to jump around and yell and cry and hug somebody. I told Justin that I could kiss a donkey’s butt I was so happy. Today has been such a good day. It’s made all these bad ones cry in shame.
I JUST GOT A CALL BACK FROM THE BUSINESS THAT I REALLY REALLY WANT TO WORK FOR AND MY STUPID PHONE WENT PSYCHO. I COULD KICK A PUPPY.
I went to the lake with Justin Saturday afternoon to spend some time there with his dad and brother. Admittedly, I was a little wary about going. My last few experiences there have really not been anything to write home about, and I was under so much stress that all I really wanted to do was lie in a cool, dark room somewhere and sleep for a long while. After a little thought, though, I realized maybe I did need to get away and try to relax. I really needed some time to clear my head and some fresh, new air to help me breathe a little easier. These past few weeks have definitely started to wear on me, and it was more than just a little noticeable. Shelby time was just what the doctor ordered.
It wasn’t a spectacular trip, but there were quite a few highlights that I really wanted write down so that I’d remember. Justin took me out on the water a couple of times with the jetski. Those rides are always my favorite parts of the trip. It’s just me and him right next to each other, gliding over the glossy waters into our own world. Nothing has to be said - neither of us have to entertain, because nature does that job for us.
I can’t help but to be nearly paralyzed with awe at the beauty God has generously displayed around us. It’s all ours - to love, to nurture, to depend on, to respect. Most of the time, we don’t even notice. We ignore, destroy, abuse, and take for granted the power of our earth.
It never fails, however, to steal my breath away when I’m at the mercy of its fingertips as I found myself on Saturday. It was like I was engulfed - the water stretched out around me, sky and land covering and circling, air filling my lungs and body with life. We watched a white-tailed deer quench its thirst by the lake side. Eagles soared above us. Fish leapt out of the waves to feed. A blazing sunset turned the sky shades of red, orange, and purple I’ve never seen. Everywhere you turned these hues encased the lake, giving new definition to “ring of fire.”
It was truly a day and experience that I never want to forget.
